BE ANGRY LIKE A CHILD

It’s not what you feel, but how you express it.

If you could never be intimidated again, how would you be?

How would your life look if you could go back to that 6-8 month baby state of joy and acceptance of self? Imagine a baby of this age sitting in front of you, cooing, gurgling, happy in the knowledge it is perfect, lovable, connected to spirit, accepting of all of its emotions and allowing them to flow naturally through its body, moving easily from sleep to joy to hunger to frustration to rage to sadness to joy to happy to tired to sleep? It has not yet decided, based on parental reactions, to categorise emotions into ‘good’ ones and ‘bad’ ones.

It just is. And, in this glorious state of self-love and self-acceptance, our energy is relaxed and we are instantly magnetic. Take a look at any woman who has ever struggled to become pregnant and you will see a mass of tight, anxious energy all bunched up inside of them like an accordion. When we are tight, we are not magnetic. When our energy is bunched up like an accordion of worry or depression or anger within, we cease to be fertile – on all of its levels, from health to wealth.

Depression could be considered in many cases ‘anger turned inwards’. Sometimes, if our childhood definition of ‘anger = violence’ based on what we saw and how anger was handled within the home, we will often choose a definition of safetythat demands we keep our turmoil inside rather than let it out and risk disapproval, rejection or backlash.

Consider how much harm it is doing inside of you now. At the cost of not wanting to hurt someone else, you are hurting yourself – many diseases are said to be attributed to this disease of unexpressed anger on a metaphysical level – gallstones, kidney stones, sluggish bowel, even, some, say cancer – are said to origin from the holding in of resentment, bitterness, grudges and self-loathing.

It is believed by many healing practitioners that many physical blocks are caused by emotional imbalances. Some, like Alex Orbito, a Filipino ‘psychic surgeon’ thought that it that it took about 7 years before a repetitious ‘negative’ thought manifested into a physical condition. I tend to think it’s even faster in many sensitive people – about 18months to 2 years following an energetic trauma.

So, what if you could return to that baby state of awareness? The good news is that it’s still inside you, albeit buried deep. You can retrieve it. The Dalai Lama (who still has anger issues from time to time!) believes that the more childlike we become, the wiser we are – and if you consider the calming energy of a baby, you’ll know this is true. Accordimng to some sources, he also used to have a mini-trampoline in his office, his reasoning being that it’s hard to be depressed and jump at the same time!

Humour sheds heaviness every time. Self-love clears it for good.

Consider this annoying thought: ‘My anger means I am judging or trying to control.’

Notice if you have already gone into the ‘options file’ in your logical mind and are arguing this point – “not always, there are some justifiable reasons why…” – then surrender again to the possible truth of the above thought.

My anger means I am judging or trying to control.

We are so used to wanting others to like us – the need for others’ approval is similar to crack cocaine – so easy to become dependent on it. We want others to approve of us, be like us, act like us, choose like us, communicate like us, drive like us and like the things we like – we have ceased to consider the utter absurdity of this controlling idea. Indeed, it is arrogance. While we desire and demand our own individuality, at times we fail to recognise this need in others.

There is a saying that if your enemy hits you on one cheek, turn and show your other one. Come from a state of love, not defensiveness. If you do not fight, there will be no war. Overpower with love. A daily example of this is when your partner gets angry at you. You can choose to resist or accept his or her anger.

If you resist it by not hearing it, your partner get angrier and you both become enmeshed in a web of fury. If you decide to hear your partner’s anger, you are providing a space for him or her to vent angry words, and the anger, given this space, will deplete. Peace will be restored, provided you have looked after yourself and kept yourself centered throughout this process. It gets easier with practice!

One wise teacher of mine made a profound statement when he suggested that we begin to imagine the emotion of anger as a warm wind that can blows from us or towards us at times. Our usual way to deal with it, is to grab, personalise it, put a name to it and make the wind into a wall between our hearts and others. It’s so much more enjoyable to blame someone else, let’s face it!

So what if we chose to try out a new thought about it – and see it as pure, impersonalised energy instead, that all we have to do with it is recognise it for what it is – energy – and acknowledge it and let it go past us. Perhaps if we were to trust that we could do this, change our definition of it, it could help us listen to someone else’s energy rather than take it on and make it bad.

Go on, give it a go.

And keep remembering that we are all with our partners to heal original wounds. What triggers us now is all about old triggers, old events and old ways our emotions were handled when we were in childhood. So know that it’s not you, your partner may be angry at, it’s probably his mother or father.

What to do next:

1. Consider how your parents or role models ‘did’ anger? Did they let it out in harmful ways, hold it inside and seep it out with occasional snide or poisonous remarks, take responsibility for it and own what they were feeling then let it go?

2. How did your parents ‘do’ passion? If passion and anger are two sides of the same coin, the expression of anger feeds our passionate side. Were they connected to their creativity, passion or a yearning for learning? Or were they on automatic, going through life in serious adult mode rather than joyous, inspired childlike wisdom?

3. Research Thought Field Therapy (TFT) or Emotional Freedom Technique – both are quick and easy to learn and both are meridian-based tools (like acupuncture) that you can do yourself in about 90 seconds whenever you are feeling intense about anything. Top sports people use these tools to erase tension just before a game. Have a look at the case studies on websites, find out more about it and either learn one-to-one with someone or learn it yourself. You can download the manual about EFT and how to do it for free on www.emofree.com

4. Learn new ways to speak your truth and anger in a way that harms no-one, including yourself. Find out about Healing anger, angerwork or other workshops in your area. Read up on the contents to ensure that you are also going to be learning how to express on a body level, as well as a logical one, such as in the course I regularly run.

5. Be gentle with yourself. Do some inner child work. The first step to balance is to treat yourself as the most important person in our life. It’s time for a change and you are ready to do this. Get a diary, join a group, talk about your feelings, practice honouring them as they come up instead of the old, useless ways of pushing them down using drink, work, other people’s problems, busyness, food, gambling, drugs, prescription pills – just take a time out and honour them, just like you used to when you were tiny. Underneath anger is grief, and underneath grief is anger – explore both and know that in order to be alive rather than existing, you need these two precious emotions to tap into your joy

MORE THAN PSYCHIC PROTECTION

The ability to maintain a strong, loving and harmless force field that keeps us safe through challenge and turmoil has to start with a decision to be honest about who we are and commit to traveling deeply into our most innermost, darkest corners and into places and memories that our fears would have us not recall. And, it’s at those moments in life, when we feel we cannot go on, cannot live with the pain of reality that we are in most need of a change of perspective that could reactivate our protection: what if we are merely at a turning point, rather than at an end?

Think about it. How quickly you or I imagine that each dose of painful difficulty, each insurmountable obstacle is the end, the final straw – that we have failed, it’s over, we might as well give up, forget it, escape from it, turn away from it, reject it and separate from loved ones over it. How conclusive we are!

All those souls watching us from the spirit plane must be falling over themselves in their laughter, with their clearer view of our entire life flight plan! Ah well, maybe we also stood up there and chuckled at other humans, too!

Peter Rengel, a facilitator of the California-based Human Awareness Institute (hai.org) workshops suggests that if we don’t feel the fear, we are not growing.

We’ve all, I guess, been at ‘comfortable’ points in our lives, when it’s easier to ‘put up’ with circumstances and people, than it is to change it. What keeps us there is our limiting belief that there may be no better quality of life, that this could be all there is, all we deserve.

But, consider this – what if your doorbell rang one day, and there stood a millionaire on the doorstep, with a large check with your name on. “Here,” he or she says. “This is for you to go out and create a whole new life with. I have a list of perfect partners for you in my limo, the best nanny in the universe to care for your children while you are busy recreating your life, and of course, money is no object.”

Well, I can wager that most of us, once we had checked out the authenticity of the offer, would be off in a matter of seconds. We now had proof of a ‘better life’ and we were going to grab it. No longer would we settle for second-best!

Well, the lesson of Spiritual Awareness, is that you have all this being offered to you now, only you are not aware of it.

You cannot see it, or have it handed to you on a platter – but, with a little work, healing, conscious discipline, and the belief that you alone can create a whole new reality -this new life is yours. It’s waiting in the wings for you to catch up. Some of us, because of our disbelief or distrust, will not reach this prize this lifetime. But others will.

Trust in the universe – it’s much more than you can see. And, consider the possibility that whoever suggested to you a very long time ago, that you would not always get what you want – could have been disastrously wrong. Many of us have grown up with these family affirmations, spoon-fed to us by unaware parents who were, in turn, fed these from their own experiences or decisions in their lives, and by their parents:

  • You don’t always get what you want
  • Nobody’s perfect
  • You have to work hard for the money
  • Life is hard
  • You only live once
  • You’ve got to grab what you can in life
  • Maybe this is all there is
  • Don’t get too big for your boots
  • There are no second chances

And so on – makes life a little sad and rather limited, don’t you think? Is this how the children of the universal life force should live? Is this all we are, all we can expect?

Once, however, we understand that these little titbits are merely free samples of larger karmic tests, we can learn how to simply hop over them, or refuse to include them in our vocabularies anymore – especially words like ‘should’ or ‘must’ that tend to be connected to shame, guilt or duty.

The more we continue to trust our intuition, and commit to continuous growth while we are living our lives, no matter how dark or frightening growth can feel, the more we clear a space for more powerful and protective energy to enter our lives.

The deeper we travel into ourselves, the more painful it will become, initially. If we know this from the outset, it can give us the strength we need to continue the journey.

It is as if we are diving into a bottomless pool, and as we stand at the water’s edge, our toes curling over the side of its banks, we notice the surface is almost solid, with murky, dense crust -as if no-one has ever broken through this top layer in centuries.

At this point, it’s a lot easier to step back, and consider a safer place to go for a little swim. Your conscious mind begins to seize control, and suggests that you don’t really need to do this – why on earth would you put yourself through all that muck?

However, this is where your Higher Self, your intuition, some inner need you have that comes from a deeper place that any part of your consciousness, whispers to you – “if your life is not happy, if you yearn to feel empowered, confident, aware, then be brave and dive! If you have a feeling that there’s more to life than what you have, then dive – and trust in the support of the universe. Know that you are always in the right place at the right time.”

So you jump – but only if you are ready to do this 100 per cent!

At first the feelings of isolation and discomfort are huge, as you battle for breath, fighting your way through the wet darkness, until you feel a hand reaching out to guide you onwards.

You trust it, and allow yourself to be guided – or you reject it, out of more fear, not wanting to be seen as vulnerable or needy – and battle on stoically, often for a lot longer than your journey would have been, had you learned the lesson of Trust.

Perhaps, the second time around, when you feel the hand again – and begin to understand that your decision to reject first has not cost you rejection in return – you may accept the support, and move into a place of knowing. Knowing that to show vulnerability is a sign of power, inner strength and potency – and not the man-made definition of weakness that comes from ancient patriarchal fears. To feel all of your emotions is to know yourself.

And, in order to move forward, we have to go back in time. Find someone who can lead you backwards – a sensitive, loving and aware facilitator of a group, perhaps – such as John Bradshaw, whose work focuses on the inner child and the family, or the Human Awareness Institute, whose workshops help people change their lifescripts about who they are. Both offer powerful and experiential workshops in many parts of the world – and, still, are only two choices for your personal growth.

After the lesson of Trust comes the lesson of learning how to be yourself, without the masks we wear each day, with a complete range of emotions, and not merely the ones we are allowed to have – such as anger for men, and sensitivity for women.

Boys and men can, and must cry; girls and women can, and must get angry without crying as the first response. And, there are so many others – so much structure, so many rules of how we should behave as humans – passed unconsciously down to us by generations of parents and children who become parents.

Remember this: If God wanted to hide on this earth, he would hide inside a human being, as that’s the last place we would think of looking! It’s true.

We can spend so much of our lives looking for God in places outside of ourselves, that we forget that we are all part of the One – whatever name you wish to call it.Just think how impenetrable your energy would be the moment you discover you have a piece of God, Goddess or Great Spirit inside of you!

In short, your life purpose is to do this now.

Your purpose is to become who you really are. So, how can you become more authentic, in your life, as it looks, right now? Sure, you’re going to put a few noses out of joint, upset the apple cart, maybe even get a bit unpopular and rock the boat, but who says that’s a bad thing?

You are here to learn to love – yourself first then other people. Notice the good in all, rather than the bad first. Understand that there are only two ways to act in this lifetime – in love or violence. As Stan Dale says, everything we do is either an act of love – or violence.

And, yes, sometimes the hardest people to love are ourselves. We can be our most savage critics. We surround ourselves with constant motion, noise and bustle – in order to not notice the loud chaos inside us. Sometimes it’s too painful to be Present.

So, let’s get back to our courageous diver, swimming deeper into the bottomless pool, allowing him or herself to be supported in this place of fear and vulnerability, and loving themselves for their own courage and ability to smash through barriers of fear.

The diver heads back in time towards the past, a time that can often be too traumatic for us to consciously remember. Luckily, our subconscious does – and ably steers us towards those old events that had us believe we weren’t lovable or deserving.

In this place, you begin to realize that it’s more about what you decided about yourself, than what happened to you.

When you’ve found that old, forgotten or repressed decision, you can start to change it, to reword your lifescript, and to talk to that child you once were, and let it know, from your adult perspective – that it is not necessary to hold onto that decision anymore.

Tremendous healing takes place at this tender level, and it’s a place that you can only reach with a willingness to grow and to feel some pain, before you can feel a deeper level of joy than you have ever known. You are then able to shed your old, painful skin for a glowing, rich, healthy, aware and happy one.

Magically, you’ll begin to attract other powerful people into your life, until your world will look vastly different from a decade ago. You’ll choose not to isolate yourself out of fear. You’ll understand that to receive love, you first have to give it – what you put out, comes back, remember?

And, the first person you have to learn to give love to, is yourself. The rest is easy. This is the key to impenetrability.

OUR MOST POPULAR FEARS

Some live with fear every day. Many live in a perpetual state of war, others with anxieties that seep into the glimpses of joy, peace and connections available in life.

Here are the three top fears that are pretty much everyone’s, certainly in the fortunate West:

  1. We will do anything to avoid feeling pain.
  2. Public Speaking – and universally there is one clear winner.
  3. Death

We already have enough, had enough of it in our own lives, it makes us breathless, it grinds us down. The amount of storage in our bodies we now use to mash pain into, grows each day, clogging arteries, dulling metabolism…

It’s a wonder we haven’t died yet. How much more can we take?

Still, we take more.

Have you ever wondered why more people don’t die in cars, with so many driving around every day?

That’s because we, underneath everything, wield control of our emotions and consequently much of our physical health. … and fear can keep us alive even when it’s scaring us to death.

So we bury more pain.

We freeze-dry to reduce the incoming sludge from daily negative media, we build faster elevators to have us move evermore swiftly into our heads, running down tight little analytical corridors to the panic room. There we isolate from the river of tragedy, sipping on a cup of soothing warm liquid with warm toast as we ponder our work project, our shopping list, tonight’s dinner inspired by a Facebook photo.

Even now and again we spit out a bit of pain, like a breadcrumb under the tongue, that leaked out of its tightly sealed storage in our internal holding bays, projectile vomiting it towards the nearest trigger: a cheery face, an exuberant child who’s not acting like an adult, an arrogant driver, an unconscious passerby, an emotional teenager… someone we believe can secretly see who we are, really. Someone who is still more sensitive than we are trying not to be.

So we launch an attack. It can feel good, even exhilarating to let some tension out.

We watch their faces crumple with a tiny uninhibited sense of satisfaction, feeling the power of making change happen, even in our own little world’s.

Then, quickly to guilt, shame, regret, more to store inside.

Thankfully, the ability for us to feel anything but perhaps four emotions these days is strengthening, so we can filter and sometimes even ignore our natural human response to inflicting pain upon others.

We are the little man sitting inside the Dr Who Dalek. We are the Emperor in his new clothes.

It’s said that man creates war to express his anger.

So, deal with your internal tornado. There’s plenty of anger management tools and teachers in your sphere. You cannot do this alone as you have a manipulative, slippery mind who will duck, dive and dodge whenever you get close to something really authentic within you.

Don’t follow governments, politicians, celebrities, reality stars, newsreaders, your parents.

Find your own voice.

Remember the power of self-revolution.

Regardless of your age or the busyness of your life, you still have time to make significant change inside yourself. If there’s anything worse than harbouring pain for all the years you have, it’s harbouring pain for another year, another month, another day. You are still alive. You are not a newborn in an Iraqi hospital that’s just been bombed. You are not a child refugee using all her energy to avoid the night shadows.

You are still alive. Act now.

Anger, used consciously, can change anything.

We judge others by their behaviour, yet ourselves by our intentions. Practice doing this the other way around.

Cynicism and negativity are lazy habits. Resign from the unconscious collective of drones who disconnect. Question everything but stay open to personal experiences that offer alternative perspectives.

Learn from the resilience of children, and their capacity to access all that joy you’ve frozen over time. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood.

Treat the intensity of fear like dark chocolate, by only allowing yourself to feel it for 5-10 mins a week. Just enough to open you to new adventure and acts of courage, but not enough to shut you down and have you run inwards.

Develop the discipline of gratitude in everyday life. The stronger this gets, the more power you have to move through your obstacles

SOULS IN HUMAN BODIES

There’s an old hymn I remember from childhood, called ‘I Shall Not Pass This Way Again’. What we know, with personal experience into reincarnation or past lives, is that this statement is inaccurate. Most of us hold the belief that we do pass this way again, we do return, in a cycle of movement of incarnation into life, life after death and of reincarnation.

And the purpose? To complete, to learn our lessons, to grow our spirituality, to open to love, to heal and to be healed, to honour and finalise those agreements with those we are connected to in karmic relationships – here on this earth.

On a soul level, we understand this cycle, and we know why we have chosen our circumstances and situations and what the learnings are within them. We know this, deep with us, but on an everyday level, it’s easy to forget, to watch what is happening within our lives and beyond us, out there in the world with all its pain and misery and seeming chaos – with horror, sorrow and judgment.

The media offers little other than bad news and thanks to technology we can see misery, and violence happening beyond our own doorstep, our own community, in places like Bangladesh, America, Europe, Africa.

What do we take from this experience? Usually a sense of sadness and a deep feeling of helplessness. At that moment we lose our centre, that wise part of us that understands that everything, somehow is in perfect order, that the earth we are living upon is essentially a School – one in which souls wrestle with karma, work things out and complete agreements with each other.

School is about learning and growth, and difficulty and pain is often our greatest teacher. The Buddhists have a saying that ‘pain is inevitable, suffering is not’. How quickly you process, learn from and travel through the necessary journey of pain will depend on how comfortable you are staying in ‘suffering’, giving power to the ‘Victim’ part inside us all.

Trauma is how we learn best. And, in order to go deeper inside ourselves to access the joyful energy of our spirit, it’s necessary to go through the pain first – a little like a birthing mother in labour. And, as many of you know, labour is challenging, messy and there are moments when we wish not to feel it, not to continue because the pain is so great. And the key to moving through it is to breathe, to reclaim that centre, and to let how to go, whilst holding the vision of a healthy happy baby at the end of it all. So in life, it’s important to understand that while there will always be a journey of challenge, there is a gift at the other end, a gift of wisdom, of clarity, of understanding, of moving onwards and upwards.

When we think of spirituality, we often think of the yogi on the mountain, the Tibetan monks in silent meditation, of priests and nuns committed to the light of the Universal, by whatever name they call it. Our souls recognise their calling, and often wonder at their ability to disengage from the rest of life so calmly and serenely.

The trouble is that we are all souls within human bodies on this earth in School. We are in this form to have the human experience, to feel our feelings, to grow and open. This means, as much as we dislike it sometimes, that we are forced to be in relationship with other human beings on the planet. This is our karmic lot, and there’s not much we can do about it. It’s a little like going to the dentist – you know you have to, but you don’t really want to.

So how do we grow while we are here? It’s said that there are two paths to Enlightenment – one is Transcendence, and other is Transformation. These paths are very different and the energies within them feel different too.

Transcendence is the path in which we get to strengthen our connection to spirit – the divine spirit, our connections to the heavenly realms as well as the earth beneath our feet and the wisdom of Mother Earth. So we learn how to sit quietly, how to have faith in something we might not yet see or understand fully, to see our lives in a greater, more loving perspective, to let go of our judgements that separate ourselves from loving other people, and from loving ourselves. To open up to the light, to work with powerful vortex energy, to clear a space inside so that we can hear better. That is transcendence – and its energy is passive and opening, a surrendering.

Then there is Transformation – this is more active in energy – and one in which we look at the choices we have made in life, what we have learn from every relationship, every connection we’ve had with others, a path in which we also take a good hard look at ourselves and take responsibility for our limiting thoughts, attitudes and actions. In order to grow spiritually, we have to do the personal work too, and there will always be some who do not understand that.

One cannot be truly spiritual unless one is being honest, acting in integrity with oneself and choosing love over fear, awareness over ignorance and having an impact on the world that is very loving and utterly harmless. What others may do is their choice. We are all responsible for ourselves only. Personal growth is a journey and one is never finished with it unless you have no more reason to incarnate. This path is about letting go of the stuff that gets in the way of loving and being loved.

So which path are you on now? Which path are you choosing? Are you choosing one over the other?

The catch is this: we have to travel both these paths during our lifetimes. And often what we see around us are those who have chosen to ignore one path and have committed their lives to the other. Relationships are considered the most difficult yoga, the most challenging spiritual practice of all. What path has the yogi chosen on his mountain? And, if our reason for being here is to learn about the importance of spirit over the mind, to open ourselves to God, to the Universal energy, in order to receive wisdom and inspiration – what has the workaholic businessman chosen for his path?

So how can you interpret this on an easy everyday level?

Firstly, perhaps, how about taking on the thought that Life is About Letting Go. That nothing is permanent, that there is no “been there, done that” – as every time you walk down a familiar path you think will be predictable, will be the same as before – it’ll be different, because of who you are now, compared to who you were then. Sometimes, I think we have a way of freezing our images of people – as if we are growing day by day, but they aren’t necessarily – like an old photo in a wallet. Perhaps we can change that image by imagining that we are all seeds in a nursery, all of us growing day by day.

Secondly, knowing that you are always at Choice. That if nothing is the same, then there is nothing sacred about tradition – especially the ones we were brought up, that limited our view of ourselves and of life. If we were in charge of ourselves and could make different choices, right now, in this moment – what kind of relationships would we be choosing to have with other people – be they with our parents, our children, our partners, our friends, our enemies?

I live by a simple rule of thumb and that is to examine each relationship I have in my life from the perspective of being a flowering plant, living in rich soil perhaps in the Botanical gardens! As I see each person before me, I ask myself: does this person support me in growing? Do I feel nourished by my connection with her or him? Does he/she notice my leaves, my flowers, do I feel seen for who I am and appreciated? Am I being watered and fed by this gardener?

If not, if I feel that my soil is dry and cracked, and my plant is withering from lack of love and positive energy, I will choose to let go of that relationship. There is nothing that dictates that we should be beholden to any lousy gardener, regardless of whether they are family or friends. There are always more loving people out there available to us. We just have to let go and trust. So take a look at your relationships and take a look at your attitudes and thoughts, and see what you need to let go of, what words no longer suit you, perhaps words like “should” or “must”, anything that is unloving. Choose who you are, and what your values are, for you, not passed down from one generation to the next.

Notice your judgements. There are two types of people in this world – those who believe there are two types of people, and those who don’t. If every soul is down here in school, and if we are One in spirit, then how can we be separate from the criminal, those who destroy? How do we know what his path is, and how can we be sure that his victim is unaware of a karmic bond between them and that they are completing a necessary agreement so that they can each move onwards? How do we know this is not the case? Often its easy to stay in the drama, rather than take a bird’s eye view – gain a wider perspective on life.

So we have choice – choice to open our hearts to others, to take responsibility, to be real with other people, to take a risk and jump, and trust that you are being held in the palm of a great spirit hand. And we learn to let go, because we know that the more we can let go of the unloving stuff, the more space we have to receive the good stuff, the light.

So consider who you might to be ready to let go of – perhaps there are people in your life you still need to forgive. What’s clear is that forgiveness is a journey. Who are you ready to love more?

And, consider this thought: what if you had two weeks to live? How would you spend the last 14 days of your life, starting on this very day? What would you want to tell people?

What if you lived every day with that thought. How would they transform your life, right now?

I think the trick is to love people like they’re gone. To say everything you ever wanted to tell those you care about. And to look at how to let go of those you don’t. As surely as the clock ticks, whatever agreements you have not completed in this life with someone, you will continue to work on and heal in the next – so knowing that, what do you need to heal with another?

May we not die unlived lives

TENANTS IN YOUR ENERGY!

As a psycho-spiritual hypnotherapist of many years, I used to work a lot with people who were sensitive and naïve about energy. While I had the occasional ‘clinical’ straightforward types of sessions with clients in terms of habit resolution, like quitting sugar, most people found me to work with a level of energy we cannot often see, but can certainly feel.

‘Rosemary’, came to see me because she was feeling lack-lustre, her energy dissipated and her head foggy.

What she wanted out of her session with me, was clarity, a sense of direction.

A hypnotherapist has a huge responsibility to not have their own agenda out there, when working with a client. The power of suggestion, especially within a hypnotherapist’s hands, can often result in a heavy-handed and manipulative approach, a situation in which the hypnotherapist holds the power, and the client, none.

So, I never used words like ‘Now, I want you to….’ As that would disrupt their individual focus and bring it back to outside authority.

All I would do, instead, would be to create safety, add protection then open a door and hold up a light for my clients to see their own way, and to walk their own steps.I was simply the tour guide, holding the space for the client herself to delve into her own intuitive processes and recover the jewels single-handedly.

As I work within the fields of soul retrieval, spirit releasement, past life and the new, exciting area of inter-life work – the amazing and much unexplored space between lives – I am always on the lookout for certain other energies to pop up during a session.

Now someone with a ‘low energy state’ as Rosemary had that day, might indicate a wide range of different causes – from depression and illness through to low spirit energy or, in this case, the lodging of an entity within her.

There is a precise process within spirit releasement hypnotherapy that allows me to discover and identify the presence of attached discarnate spirits or entities. Having done this, I dialogue with the spirit, and discover its history and reasons for being there.

Now, when one thinks of ‘entity’, all sorts of dramatic images are conjured up – twisting heads et al. There is a huge difference between working as therapist to a stuck entity rather than a scolding priest brandishing a crucifix.

The truth is, an entity is actually a dark clump of energy that dissipates our own energy. It can often have a persona, with its own name and face, and usually moves into our space when we are at a low point in our lives.

One reason entities move in with us is because the low, depressed or ‘negative’ energy we are putting out, is attractive to their vibrations. It’s one of the Natural Laws – one we put out, we get back, remember?

This is why it is crucial to remember that every thought-form is powerful, and that it is in the accumulation of our ‘positive’ or ‘negative’ thoughts that results in things happening to us and around us. It’s therefore important to practice releasing ‘negative’energy as cleanly and as quickly as we can, rather than allowing anger, resentment or grief to build up and congeal within our bodies in readiness for a future illness or entity to thrive upon it.

In my conversations with entities during hypnotherapy sessions, I have learned that, for the most part, they join with the client during a traumatic time, often in childhood.

After Rosemary had settled into a light trance – a gentle state of relaxation in which part of you is here in present time, and part of you is not – I began to discover, through various questions and intuitions, where her session would lead us today.

It soon came to my notice that I was having this session with more than one person. At first the entity was reluctant to talk to me at all, and a process of building up a relationship of trust began. Later, when the entity felt more secure with me, he introduced himself as Tarquin, and told me that he had attached himself to Rosemary when she was eight. I have heard this many times from these spirits that, at the time of attachment to a human being, regardless of the human’s age, these entities have felt needed.

This was true in Tarquin’s case, also. “She needed me,” he explained. “There was no-one else to protect her from everything that was happening at home.”

So the initial intentions of an entity, when it moves in, are to help. There is a sense that the human being cannot do it alone, and the sense of responsibility for the welfare of the person is assumed by the entity.

Tarquin expressed his frustration with working with “such a difficult person”, who never listened to him anymore, and that he was beginning to feel all his efforts were no longer valued.

As my goal, as hypnotherapist, is to convince the discarnate spirit to be released into the Light, and out of the client’s energy field, so that she can be freed up to continue her growth and reclaim her energy, a counselling process follows.

Often, as a clairvoyant and clairsentient, my work in the past has involved working with ‘trapped’ souls – belonging to people who have died very suddenly, and who are still in shock and disbelief about their transition into spirit from the physical world.

The process of having them begin to notice their choices and to move towards Light, are almost the same for entity work. Gradually, a spark of understanding appears as they realise that they do not have to sit in this place of confusion and pain, and they automatically then begin to see loved ones in spirit and spirit guides who are waiting to guide them on.

This happened with Tarquin. Through our process, he learned to trust me enough to trust my vision of the Light and the Guides waiting to take his hand. At first, he was deeply fearful, like a child who is too scared to move on, and too reluctant to stay. But finally, and ever so gently he found some courage, grasped the hand of a Guide he now trusted, and moved out of ‘Rosemary’s’ energy field and out of the room.

For a moment, my hypnotherapy room was suffused with light. Rosemary suddenly sat up, still in her hypnotic state and gasped “I’ve just lost a leg!” Knowing that the removal of an entity that has been part of our energy system can be felt, I knew this was simply her noticing the absence of this unhelpful energy that had diluted her power for so long. I moved her back into a relaxed state and as the energy shifted, I sealed in the protection around ‘Rosemary’, myself and my space, and gently drew my client back peacefully into present time and space, back into the room.

She returned, feeling hazy, and not recalling anything other than my voice suggesting she relax at the start of our session together. After a few minutes, she added that she felt empty, as if she was missing something, and that she felt a little sad.

Often this can be a natural feeling after spirit releasement. It’s a feeling of empty, but it’s a good empty! Unsurprising, really, when one considers that the two of you have been together, as one, for often years and years.

As Rosemary experienced it, it really might feel a little like losing a leg – it will itch for a while and you will feel the loss.But as she continues to build up her energy again, she will learn to fill that space with lighter, more powerful energy.

Whenever we ‘clean’ out our space and let things or people go that no longer serve us to hold on to, we have the choice to fill that space with more deserving energy that assists us in moving ahead.